Ride 'Em Cow Fish

9 seconds: The average attention span of a goldfish. One second longer than the standard for professional bull riding, and one second longer than the average human attention span. It's why a goldfish was the head of the board of directors in season 2 of The Umbrella Academy. It's why they always win at the rodeo, make such great pets, and why one has personally bested me in a staring contest.