Liberation during the pandemic - By Paromita Chatterjee

Ridim was born as Sweta Bannerjee and assigned a female gender at birth. It has been an uphill task for Ridim to explain his predicament to his family. When he lost his last job as a security personnel, Ridim’s love for flowers gave him a sudden inspiration.

His hometown Konnagar is 20 km away from Kolkata. The lockdown meant the local trains were not plying for a prolonged period of 8 months. Therefore Ridim's bicycle became his trusted steed, his only means of transport to reach the flower market. 

In the darkness, before dawn, Ridim would cycle through the dimly lit by-lanes, snaking through desolate fields. This was his usual route to reach the highway while the curfew was in place.

"When I came up with my business idea (to sell flowers), my friends were full of enthusiasm. They helped me by cutting small branches from trees, to set up a tent and make this tabletop - that's how my tiny shop was born," says Ridim.

When Ridim started in the flower business, he had no idea about the art of haggling. After months of trial and error, he is quite seasoned now.

Ridim is now used to carrying heavy loads and negotiating his way through the crowded market. His phone was stolen in the crowd recently, and even though it is troublesome, he leaves his new phone at home now.

"I have always wanted to style my hair into spikes, just like other boys. But my folks refuse to let me," rues Ridim. He makes up for that by applying a little serum when no one is looking.

My neighbours have always been very curious about my orientation and my whereabouts. They would often gossip about me. However, when I started my business during the lockdown, they have shown support by buying flowers from my shop instead of going to the market. Some would come straight to my house and wake me up early in the morning even before I open my shop, to buy flowers”, smiles Ridim.

"Lily, my neighbour's pet cat, always keeps me company. I have made her my business partner," laughs Ridim.

"Mostly my neighbours come to buy flowers from my shop. But I am planning to shift the shop out of my house to a more visible intersection. That way I can draw customers from other localities too," says Ridim.

Ridim can only make a couple of visits to the market every week. Every day he checks whether his flowers are still fresh.

To this day, Ridim’s parents are in denial about his gender identity. He is still humiliated by them before their extended family. "About 9 PM my family converges around the television. Though sitting in the same room, we continue to live in our own bubbles. We hardly ever find a common ground to communicate."

Not being able to relate to society around him, he finds solace in nature. If money was no object, he would invest in an aviary. As for now, he holds his little garden close to his heart.

When I asked whether he wanted to remain anonymous in my project, Ridim's reply was quick: "No, I want people to see me for who I am. My trans-ness is not a disease."